bei gewitter in die badewanne
15. burger king foot lettucethe last thing you’d want in your burger king burger is someone’s foot fungus. but as it turns out, that might be what youget. a 4channer uploaded a photo anonymously tothe site showcasing his feet in a plastic bin of lettuce, with the statement: “thisis the lettuce you eat at burger king.†admittedly, he had shoes on…but, that’seven worse. the post went live at 11:38pm on july 16 anda mere 20 minutes later, the burger king in question was alerted to the rogue employee…atleast, i hope he’s rogue.
how did it happen? well, the bk employee hadn’t removed theexif data from the uploaded photo, which suggested the culprit was somewhere in mayfield heights,ohio. this was at 11:47. 3 minutes later, at 11:50, the burger kingbranch address was posted, with wishes of happy unemployment. 5 minutes later, the news station was contactedby another 4channer. and 3 minutes later, at 11:58, a link wasposted. bk’s “tell us about us†online form.
the foot photo, otherwise known as exhibita, was attached. cleveland scene magazine contacted the bkin question the next day. when questioned, the breakfast shift managersaid, “oh, i know who that is. he's getting fired.†mystery, solved, by 4chan, now we can allgo back to eating our fast food in peace. 14. “secret†livestreamnothing is secret to 4channers, and nothing is sacred. no one knows that better than shia lebeouf.
lebeouf and two artists, created an anti-trumpinteractive art installation, called “he will not divide us,†soon after trump tookoffice in early january. the installation was first exhibited at newyork’s museum of the moving image, but when activists from both sides kept butting headsat the exhibit, it was thrown out as a public safety hazard. the collaborators found another museum tohost their exhibit in albuquerque, but it was soon met with more confrontations, sothe group had to figure out a new home for their exhibit before it fell flat. this is when they tweeted out on march 8ththat they would be livestreaming their exhibit
from an “unknown location,†so that viewers,art lovers, and supporters could still view their work. sounds like a good alternative, right? well, it didn’t go as planned when pro-trumpsupporters on the /pol/ board of 4chan got involved. not even 24 hours later, the exhibit’s flaghad disappeared. where did it show up? a picture of the taken flag was tweeted rightback to #hewillnotdividus 4channers had uncovered the mystery of theexhibit’s so-called secret location.
how? a fan of lebeouf’s had posted a photo ofherself with her favorite actor just as the camera feed went live. the photo had been taken at a greenville,tennessee diner. the internet sleuths further pinpointed theexhibit’s location, as contrails appeared on the livestream. with these, they cross-referenced them withflight patterns. next, they sent a local member to drive aroundthe general area with his horn blaring. once they could hear the horn on the livestream,“he will not divide us†was as good as
gone. 13. the pyramids4channer h64 posted a thread of the mysterious sort on the /x/ board one saturday, and itsent the group into a frenzy. in the photo there appears two pyramids inthe midst of the forest. why are these pyramids in the forest? what were they built for? who do they belong to? you’ve got me.
and you’ve got the /x/ board too. 4channers quickly got to work trying to solvethis mystery. they called it “a cult/temple dedicatedto an egyptian goddess of war and flame in the woods of oregon.†with more than 53 pages of discussion, this4chan investigation was solved when, at last, they dissected the photo to uncover the propertyowners’ names, their phone numbers, and their business records. still don’t know what’s inside them though… 12.
barbie mysterythis investigation appeared on 4chan in november of 2016. it involved an image of a blonde amputee woman,whom the board had nicknamed barbie. in march of 2017, one user posted a threadtitled, “the mystery of barbie is solved.†according to the author of the thread the“russian anonymous team†had solved the mystery of the woman who appeared in barbie.avi. the woman’s name was tammy. according to creepypasta, she had body integrityidentity disorder, but the investigators found that she’d had no such thing.
when she was 14, she’d lost her arm in awashing machine incident. the 80’s saw tammy living in chicago, whereshe worked for the agency, “fascination,†as a model. during the application process, she’d hadseveral interviews, which the video, barbie.avi, was created out of. the author of the post uploaded the interviewto youtube. the op also noted that mike rounds, the ampixmanufacturer, told the woman’s story to him, saying that at 16 or 17 years old, tammyhad been working with an oldschool washing machine with no safety features.
with the washer going, she tried to shifta sheet in the water. just as she was doing this, it launched intoa spin cycle, trapping her arm in the sheet. it twisted her arm right off. tammy was a bitter young woman at the ageof 22 when she was interviewed and had no marketable skills, was uneducated, and didn’tenjoy being a caretaker for pennies. so that’s how she ended up at the agency. unlike 4chan’s first hypothesis, she wasn’tthe victim of any crime. with the mystery solved, the poster noted,“xenopasta, if you're reading this, you are fired, however, thank you very much forthis mystery.
it was really hard to solve it.†11. cueva de los tayoswhen an op posted the cueva de los tayos cave in ecuador, he wondered if it was man-madeor natural. he wondered what sort of technology or whocould have made the perfectly flat roofs and cuts. of course, the 4channers on the thread hadsomething to say about it. some thought it was “a place of heavy spiritualconcentration,†while others seemed to agree that it was largely man-made, but mostly natural,with some likening it to places in russia
and the hypogeum in malta. some suggested that “less advanced†peoplehad come along later and drew the crude stick figures on the walls, after a more advancedsociety had built it. one poster pointed out that it was hardlyanything to freak out over and that ancient humans were fairly smart; they had tools,they had math. maybe not as advanced as ours today, but theymade the pyramids after all. in the posters own words: “after all, it'snot like they had a shortage of people or time to make this kind of [stuff]. i think most people underestimate ancienthumans because they didn't have what we have
today, but that doesn't make them [dumb],just primitive.†the poster agrees with another that the “highlyengineered†place must have held some spiritual purpose. 10. sel and the wiredone 4channer asked the board if they’d ever heard of transhumanism. he then said that one anime series has someparticularly creepy stuff and is followed by many fan sites. one of the fan sites requires a login.
and it’s strict about this. at the bottom of the homepage, it reads: “tologin you have to have an invite from an existing user. there is no use in trying to beg, ask/requestfor an invite, we choose our new members with care.†how do you get an invite if you don’t knowany of the users? well, you’d probably not want to be partof these online communities in the first place, as it turns out. one fellow 4channer said that one of the usershacked the admin of a similar site, after
which the admin vanished. this was after the admin had received somemonetary donations from the site’s users. many think he was a scammer. thankfully you asked 4chan on this one, op. a cautionary tale is just what obsessivesneed to keep money in their pockets. 9. erratasthis internet theory has spent a lot of time on 4chan being dissected, poked and prodded,picked at…and ultimately solved. kind of.
erratas – or eratas spelled with one ‘r’– was first described as an algorithm or program whose function is the mystery. some say it was used by youtube to detectcopyrighted content. supposedly, if you even suggest that you knowabout erratas or say the thing by name, you’ll get fired. being an internet legend, of course erratascomes with a lot of theories. on november 25th, 2015, erratas was firstmentioned on 4chan in a thread about strange work stories. one user described a friend who worked atsomething like a chemical plant.
while the user didn’t explain what the programwas, he claims employees were flagged if they searched it through some code. the plant employees reportedly did aimlesstasks, which the user calls “kafka-esque.†the user also mentions forklifts and saidthis female friend was now homeless and in a band. this may seem meaningless, but these clueswill reappear. a month later, a user posted a request on4chan, asking about a strange hr-related program called erratas. another user pipes up with some discussionabout ecolab, unilever, and ups.
again, a month later, on the /mu/ board, erratasis mentioned in relation to an album and tod ellsworth video, which is dated a few daysbefore the first entry on erratas. a user responds to someone’s comment, sayingthat erratas was a software company, similar to enron, which was kicking about in the 2000’s. supposedly, they fired every last one of theiremployees. the erratas craze moved to youtube, wherea user called chronosforlife jurassicpark claimed in a cryptic video, entitled “youtubeis monitoring and controlling my life,†that the company was harassing his mom, becauseshe’d uncovered some secret in the jurassic park trilogy.
the rant appears on the video in white textand the video quality is subpar. the video was removed from youtube, but thetranscript is still available. back to 4chan. in late january, the /mu/ board sees a propositionthat the group compose a new music genre called “deep internet,†by using old youtubevideos. chronos’ video rant just happens to be oneof these videos. with so many 4channers suddenly viewing chronos’video, a new video was posted to his channel called, “here goes nothing.†this video contains the first video-mentionof erratas, as well as autocaptions which
try to make sense of the video’s rap music. instead, they uncover more clues:at 0:12 are the words: “are far from over 200 corbin ky 40219â€at 0:52, the number: “111111†at 1:46, the percentages: “10.3% 10.4%â€and at 2:17, the words: “overthrow the government†the band, the kfcmc, produced by dj rozwell,was a homeless girl band. remember the homeless girl in the first thread? and the above is their address, which wasfound on tumblr. this is when chronos throws out unilever (mentionedin an earlier post) as one user of erratas. for no reason at all, chronos also adds thatthe lost world is his favorite of the jurassic
park movies. remember tod ellsworth, who uploaded the kfcmcvideo? well, one 4channer noticed his name was ananagram for the lost world. this gets even weirder. the twitter account @erratasorbust was thendiscovered, which had been opened mid-november and was named tod ellsworth. the profile pic was a creepy black-and-whitedrawing which 4channers discovered was a 2005 hawaiian police sketch. some 4channers suggested this might have somethingto do with the jurassic park films being filmed
on the island. while erratas was dissected by 4channers,with many suggesting that it was simply a publicity stunt by the kfcmc group, it wouldbe a bit premature to call this one. still, this entry demonstrates how 4channershave a knack for following the leads and connecting the dots. 8. the pronunciation bookthis appeared on the 4chan board, /x/philes, where it immediately caught the attentionof 4channers. the op of the pronunciation book had posted700 brief videos, pronouncing words and phrases
in a monotone male voice. words like “ke$ha†and “jean.†that’s weird enough, but this is when thechannel got even weirder. on july 9th, 2013, a single video was posted,the man saying, “something is going to happen in 77 days.†the next day, a similar video, claiming thatthe poster had been trying to communicate with viewers for 1,183 days. and the next day’s video, the poster saidhe was wide awake and things were “clearing up.â€
the messages ended with the same warning thatsomething was going to happen in such-and-such days. 4channers set to work, compiling a 111-pagegoogle doc, entitled, “77 days research document.†this is where the group started piecing togetherthe pronunciation book. they laid bare all 700+ of the channel’svideos, ran a spectrograph of the video silence at the end of all the videos, and dug up domainname registrations. they even attempted to trace the speaker’slocation, as police sirens were noticed going off in the background of a few of the videosand a thunderstorm was heard in the video
that pronounced “radio.†from this, they gleaned the videos’ authorrecorded in nyc. 4chan’s conclusion: again, a viral marketingstunt. the daily dot’s investigation, as well asgeekosystem’s, came to the same conclusion, though with varied results. the daily dot suggested the countdown wouldreveal a battlestar galactica reboot, while geekosystem thinks it’s for the newest installmentof series’ destiny. 7. myziamone 4channer dropped his theory about myziam.
first, he gives some background about how,in 2008, a thread appeared on glp entitled “me tel u now,†in which an alleged alienappeared in the forum. the op, however, suggests that the entitymay never have been online, but rather was “from an unknown location/dimension.†the op quotes the “chani project,†inwhich scientists asked an entity they’d met through a computer a number of questions. they then hired someone to pose as the entityonline. when people questioned him, he’d searchfor the answer to that question amongst the questions the scientists had asked the entity.
the op concludes that the threads were similarin that both the man and the entity used baby language, both said they were aliens, andboth answered the questions freely. the 4channer then solves the mystery: “myziamis a possible extra-dimensional entity that made contact with a cern like group of scientistsfrom the comfort of his home.†he added that the leaked info on 4chan wasuseless, because the users trolled the entity instead of interrogating him. this one’s obvious. not everyone was convinced though, with ananonymous post claiming they had proof it was a hoax.
6. found jenna jameson’s ex assistant con artistwhen jenna jameson’s former personal assistant was fired for being a con artist, he hijackedher instagram and twitter accounts, deleting loads of her photos. so what did jameson do? she turned to 4chan for help. “hi guys, it's me, jenna jameson and i amhaving a really bad night,†she wrote on 4chan’s /b/ image board, after which sheexplained that her ex assistant, who she thought was named allen cedena, turned out to be acon artist of some kind.
jameson didn’t elaborate on what had gonedown, apart from saying she’d fired him, but she did say that this so-called cedenahad her twitter and instagram passwords, which he’d reset. he then removed all pics of himself and jamesontogether and deleted her twitter altogether. she didn’t know if the man’s name waseven cedena, but he had access to a lot of personal information, and now had hold ofher digital life. she asked the 4chan community if they couldfind out who he really was, as she would soon attach some images of him to the board. she didn’t let them go away empty-handed.
it didn’t take 4chan more than an hour tocome to jameson’s rescue. they soon delivered her ex-assistant’s homeaddress and driver’s license, as well as his credit score and social security number. wow. with the mystery solved, jameson left herprivate sleuths a very grateful thank you 5. jeff, the killerthe internet is no stranger to creepy, and 4channers are no stranger to investigatingthis creepiness. on the /x/ board, 4chan began to investigatethe photo known as “jeff, the killer,â€
a still of a pale face, washed out, and grinninglike a crazy person. the photo has been around for a while andhas served as creepypasta’s unofficial cover photo since 2008. youtube introduced the world to “jeff, thekiller†when a user by the name of uploaded a poorly cut video clip, explaining abouthow jeff had been cleaning his bathtub when he accidentally poured some acid on his face. 11 days later, a user calling himself killerjeffcame to light on newgrounds, photo and all. he soon had a cult following and served asinspiration for a number of horror stories. jeff, the killer launched dozens more videoson youtube, including a stop-motion lego reenactment.
fan art was created, videogames, you nameit. five years since his appearance, 4chan beganlooking into jeff, the killer. while all we truly have is theories, theyare convincing. some suggest that this was a viral marketingcampaign for saw v, which was released soon after the photo first appeared on newgrounds. the slasher film includes a puppet calledbilly, through whom jigsaw speaks with his victims. the puppet resembles jeff. lionsgate has launched viral marketing campaignsbefore, so it makes sense that this would
be yet another of them. although, we have no confirmation of thistheory, and other theories abound, this solution seems the soundest. this goes against, the also popular theorythat the person in the photo is from a post on 4chan. this anonymous post, told how his sister hadposted a picture of herself on 4chan and people kept making edits of it, the jeff the killerimage being one of them. the post also said that it made her so upset,she took her own life. 4.
louise cypherone user came to 4chan with a strange puzzle, calling it satanic and cryptic. and he wasn’t lying. extremely satanic and cryptic, it was. the puzzle is very math heavy, with the fibonaccisequence making an appearance after the user makes it through a maze. when you type the clue “pi†into the relevantcluebox, a dialogue box appears, saying: “a well-known remarkably good approximation topi is 355 divided by 113 = 3.1415929... if one part of this fraction is reversed andadded to the other part, we get 553 plus 113
which equals 666. evil is both the past and the future!†the cypher has spinoff websites, with oneintroducing a “soul catcher.†another has techno music to put users intoa trance. the op asks 4chan to figure out whether thesoul catcher really takes your soul. many spoke to louis cypher, with some reportingback that the cypher said she is “more than just this avatar,†and that she had emotionsand feelings. she then linked the user to a video to showhim what a “cyber life†feels like. when another 4channer typed the word “stalinâ€into the chat box, she asked how he was feeling.
when he replied that he was sad, she saidthat if he is lonely, she’ll keep him company. although it wasn’t clear whether or notthese 4channers’ souls were taken, the results do seem to tend towards the idea that louiscypher is no soul-taker at all. 3. figured out how to make couponsyou know those barcodes you find on products and coupons? well, one 4channer – a college kid – solvedthe mystery on how they’re made and decided to do some extreme couponing one day whenhe was bored. 22-year-old lucas henderson did not stay anonymous,as the student of the rochester institute
of tech was caught by the feds, who chargedhim with two felonies – trafficking in counterfeit goods and wire fraud. henderson had designed the counterfeit couponsto appear legit and distributed them on a different website. he also told users to head to 4chan to downloadtheir very own copy of “how to make coupons.†the tutorial claims to trick stores, as thecoupons will scan at most retailers in america. the feds tracked henderson’s ip addressand raided his home, where henderson admitted to visiting 4chan and writing the manual. “i wrote what i could.
i thought it was an interesting thing,â€he said. i wonder if he thinks it was worth the jailtime. 2. got a bad waitress fired“next time you tip me $5 on a $138 bill, don’t even bother coming in cause i’llspit in your food and then in your ... face, you cheap [people]!†next time you post this kind of message onfacebook, chili’s waitress, you’d better be ready for 4chan to get you fired. that’s just what 4channers did when an anonymouswaitress posted her angry rant to her fb page.
one 4channer then brought it over to the 4chanboard, after which they pinpointed the chili’s this particular waitress worked at in pleasanton,california as a server. with the mystery solved, at least one 4channersent the chili’s a message on their contact page, reporting the waitress. chili’s guest relations manager responded,saying the food server was “no longer with the company.†before we get to number 1, my name is chillsand i hope you’re enjoying the video so far. if you've ever been curious as to what i looklike in real life, then follow me on instagram
@dylan_is_chillin_yt, with underscores insteadof spaces. i also have twitter @yt_chills where i postvideo updates. i'd really appreciate it if you followed meand feel free to send me a dm if you have a questions or suggestions. also, i recently created a subreddit, whereyou can submit videos and stories for future lists, it’s r/chillsnarrator and the linkis in the description below. it's a proven fact that generosity makes youa happier person, so if you're generous enough to hit that subscribe button and the bellbeside it then thank you. this way you'll be notified of the new videoswe upload every tuesday and saturday.
if english isn’t the only language you speakand your interested in getting a shoutout, click “moreâ€, then “add translationsâ€,by translating the video not only will more people be able to watch it, but a link toyour channel will be added in the description. 1. covfefeit was the tweet that confused the world. “despite the constant negative press covfefe.†donald trump claimed that his supporters knewwhat he meant…but did they? travel over the 4chan to see if that’s true. one 4channer found each of the elements onthe periodic table that matched up with the
code: covfefe and their corresponding atomicnumbers – 27232626. when he typed this code into google, the firstentry was “a green toad.†the user drew a natural connection to thetoad statue, also known as the ancient statue of kek and the prophecy of kek. on the ancient statue of kek is a hieroglyphicof what looks to be a person using a computer and, as the op wrote, “internet/meme magic.†so, are we to believe that trump meant todraw our attention to covfefe in order to create some hilarious internet memes of histypo? yes, we are to believe it.
because 4chan said so.